Psalm 121

A song for pilgrims ascending to Jerusalem.

1 I look up to the mountains—

does my help come from there?

2 My help comes from the Lord,

who made heaven and earth!

3 He will not let you stumble;

the one who watches over you will not slumber.

4 Indeed, he who watches over Israel

never slumbers or sleeps.

5 The Lord himself watches over you!

The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade.

6 The sun will not harm you by day,

nor the moon at night.

7 The Lord keeps you from all harm

and watches over your life.

8 The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go,

both now and forever.

This is what I need lately.  The stress of life can be overwhelming, but I know that He keeps me from harm.  He watches over every aspect of life. 

Marathon Day -7

Why is it when the training is done, one questions EVERYTHING?  I walked into the garage this evening and a thought popped into my mind.  "I feel so out of shape."  Huh?!  Where did that come from?  Honestly, My upper body and core are not in the shape I would like.  But my shoulder has limited many of my usual exercises.  I have only missed 2 runs in the training cycle.  Aerobically, I am in great shape.  I have an extra year of running since my first marathon.  That alone increases my fitness.  Then there is the nutrition and hydration.  Eating enough, but not too much and the right stuff.  Drink lots of the "right" things.  Don't drink too much of the other stuff.  Rest, but not too much.  Run, but not too much.  Run fast, but not too fast. 

I sit back with my feet up now.  I breathe deep and try to calm my mind.  I have trained well.  I have put in the work.  Now I have to trust that work.  I need to remember that hard work pays off.  Just breath in and out for 7 days.  Nothing more than that.

Friday 5

My original idea of this blog was to remember the good things in life.  Lately I have been more negative than normal.  I needed the reminder that I am blessed.  Today I make a promise to myself to smile more and enjoy living.  It is Friday, so I list 5 great blessings of my life.

My husband.  He is amazing.  Patient, kind and generous.  He puts up with my idiosyncracies and actually seems to like some of them.  The last 23 years have been incredible and I cannot wait to see what the next 23 bring!

My puppies.  I may threaten trading them for goldfish, but I truly love them.  They make be crazy.  And they make me laugh.  They have such different personalities!  Indy is active and loves to be moving.  He is my four-pawed running partner.  He brightens every time I pull out my shoes.  When runs get tough, he keeps me going.  Han is the cuddler.  He would rather be held than anything else.  They each have their own piece of life to fill.

Running.  I love running!  I love the freedom I feel when I am out on the roads enjoying God's creation.  Every step releases a bit of joy within me.

My family.  They are the amazing.  God chose to put me with this group for a purpose.  There are days when I wonder why, but I love every one of them!  When I married, I was fully accepted in another family.  I am so loved and so blessed.

My greatest blessing is the love of God.  He loves me so much that he chose to give his all for me.  I cannot begin to share my gratefulness for his grace.

Tempo, Sweet Tempo

Another day of late running. Hubby had a 7 am tee time, so I waited to run until he returned home. It was a gorgeous sunny day although warmer than I would have liked for a tempo run. After a mile warm up, I set into my pace. Or, oops, a little faster than planned. Yet the first mile has a bit of downhill, so I let it ride. It felt good, more than good. I was running faster than my 5k pace and felt almost easy. I kept reminding myself that it was downhill. Yet the uphill came and the pace stayed easy. Then down and up and down and up. My legs felt great even when my breathing was labored from the humidity. By the end of the fourth mile, fatigue had set in.

I love tempo runs. And this one is at the top of the list of all time favorites! I love the effort of pushing myself just to the edge. There is such a fine line between the balance of the comfortable with the hard. Finding that balance and using it to strengthen oneself is an amazing feeling of accomplishment!

8:26, 8:29, 8:23, 8:20

Burn the Ships!

During yesterday’s long run, one of my favorite songs, Burn the Ships, played. As I have been quick to do lately, I compared the song to life especially weight loss and running. In the last year my life has changed drastically. I lost 60 pounds and started running again. The thing is that that isn’t what has really changed. The real me has changed. I no longer berate myself for being “fat and ugly.” I am no longer controlled by food. Now I am grateful for myself and appreciate the things I can do. I know that I can be successful; after all, I completed two very difficult tasks. In the 8 months since I reached my weight, I have maintained that loss and learned more and more about myself and my relationship with food. I recognize that food is fuel for body, not for comfort or when I am bored. Since I started the C25K a year ago, I have run in all conditions and in all moods. I have run in different states and I have raced longer and faster than in my 20s.

Going back to where I was a year ago is not an option. I burned my ships each and every day I learned something new about running or about nutrition. My ships went up in flames every time added a too large item of clothing into a box for Goodwill. I have nothing to go back to if I were to put weight back on. I cannot go back as God has given me the will and desire to change permanently.

Burn the Ships

Songwriters: Chapman, Steven Curtis; Elliott, James Isaac

In the spring of 1519 a Spanish fleet set sail
Cortez told his sailors this mission must not fail
On the eastern shore of Mexico they landed with great dreams
But the hardships of the new world make them restless and weak
Quietly they whispered, "Let's sail back to the life we knew"
But the one who led them there was saying

CHORUS
Burn the ships, we're here to stay
There's no way we could go back
Now that we've come this far by faith
Burn the ships, we've passed the point of no return
Our life is here
So let the ships burn

In the spring of new beginnings a searching heart set sail
Looking for a new life and a love that would not fail
On the shores of grace and mercy we landed with great joy
But an enemy was waiting to steal, kill, and destroy
Quietly he whispers, "Go back to the life you know"
But the one who led us here is saying

(Chorus)

BRIDGE
Nobody said it would be easy
But the one who brought us here
Is never gonna leave us alone

(Chorus)

A Wonderful Afternoon

Saddle Mountain Hike

Just a warning: Do NOT believe the weather forecast or satellite images when planning a hike in the Coast Range in October. We did and headed up Saddle Mountain this afternoon. In the 2.5 mile hike to the top there is a 1603' elevation gain. Not an easy hike on a good day. Today was not a good day concerning the weather. It was rainy although not a downpour; just rainy enough to think it would be no problem. However, when you break above the tree line, the wind was biting cold and the rain was almost parallel to the ground. The mountain was socked in and one would wonder why we went the entire way up. It’s just that once I get close, I cannot just turn around. I am a little obsessive and competitive that way. It was an adventure to say the least. Although we could have been more prepared, we were far more prepared than the group of twenty-somethings that were wearing light pants and sweatshirts. At least we had some rain gear, fleece and heavy jeans.

One thing I love about Oregon is the greens. Every nuance is beautiful. And when it is wet and foggy they appear even more intense. It was a beautiful hike. I can say that now that I am warm again…

Transitoning

Transitioning other foods back into my diet isn't as scary as I thought it would be. I am adding in the foods one at a time and so far everything seems to be working. I am increasing calories through more snacks and some fats as well as protein and carbs. Each evening I am planning out what I will eat the next day and putting it into MyPlan. (Food logging program on the Medifast site.) Once everything is in, I fine tune the calories and carbs and protein to get up to calorie. It is interesting how some days my carbs are really low and now I want to pop them up. I need to watch total calories not carbs in particular. I am trying to stay moderate fat and carbs though.

I am amazed how I really don't want to just go back to eating like I was before. I want to eat the veggies not the pasta. (Still haven't broken down and had a potato yet...) I am loving eating apples and I can't wait for the pears on the counter to be ready to eat.

I am researching which dairy I will add on Friday and from there on. The dairy does concern me slightly as before MF I had a lot of sinus congestion. I haven't had any on MF or yet in transition. I wonder if it is dairy products left from my childhood allergy. I'll see and adjust from there.

Practicing the planning aspect during 5/1 has really helped with adding the foods in during transition. I still think before I eat anything and review if it is on my plan and if I am actually physiologcally hungry. If is isn't on my plan but I am hungry, I find something that will fit in with nutrients as I need for the day. I don't give in to cravings like I was before. I can't believe I can actually say, "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels."

Happy Birthday to ME!

Today is my birthday. Today my scale said I weigh 135 pounds for the first time in 21 years! There is no better present to receive than a different life! On my 40th birthday last year, DH surprised me with a luau. When I saw the photos of myself afterwards, I nearly didn't recognize myself. I knew I had gained a lot of weight, but didn't realize how I looked or how bad I really felt. It wasn't until the following May that I tried Medifast. I think God directed me to it, because it has truly changed my outlook on life and gave me hope again. I feel fantastic and I look pretty darn good, too!

The first photo was taken on my 40th birthday last year. The others were taken today. The third is a photo of myself wearing a skirt that I wore shortly before I started Medifast in May 07.

My New Adventure

Today is the first day of a new adventure. On May 14, 2008, I started the adventure of Medifast. It has been an incredibly positive and productive experience. And though I still have 1.1 pounds to goal, I am starting the adventure of transition today. I plan to view it with the same eyes that I started MF with in that it is one step, one packet that will get me where I need to be.

I started at 194 pounds, bloated, uncomfortable and basically not recognizing myself in the mirror. When I looked at the pictures of myself on my 40th birthday, I was appalled and incredibly sad. I knew I needed to change, but it took me several months to choose Medifast. I am so glad I did. I ordered 4 weeks “just to try.” DH was skeptical as I had tried so many other things and he knew people that had done MF and gained it all back and more. However, thirty days later, I was 20 pounds lighter and felt better than I had in a long time. I had HOPE that I would not be forever fat. By then, DH was sold and encouraged me to keep going. Now he is my greatest supporter even when I get discouraged. It is nice that he can’t keep his eyes off of me either! I am back to the same thing though—I don’t recognize myself in the mirror anymore.

Today I weigh 136.1 pounds, wear a size 4, run 7 miles at a stretch and can comfortably sit cross-legged on the floor again. I like that I am sitting at the computer, cross-legged in the chair without discomfort. I like that I enjoy shopping for clothes again—even though I have to find new places to shop for my new size. I love the changes in my body and I make this vow. I will remember where I came from and where I am now. I will cherish my new self and treat myself and my body with the respect and dignity I deserve as a child of God.

To keep my vow I have made a plan for transition. Like I mentioned, I know people who have lost a lot of weight on MF, but gained it all back and more. I will learn from that. I will do what they did not do. I will follow the Transition Guide as written. Even on those days when “just one bite won’t hurt.” I will monitor my weight very carefully during the first weeks of transition so I can see what effects different foods have on my body. I will make lifelong changes to my diet and activity level so I can maintain my weight long term. I will not be adverse to returning to 5&1 if a few pounds creep on and I will do that as soon as I get past my range and not wait until it becomes 10 or 20 pounds.

And above all, I will keep my support system strong! My friends and family have been amazing! Thank you for all your support!