Tuesday, January 31, 2006


For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

John 3:16

As a child, I would sing “Jesus Loves Me” along with my friends. Yet I could never really understand what it really meant. God loving me was a foreign concept. I wasn’t pretty or very good; I teased my siblings and forgot to brush my teeth. I was unable to understand how an omnipotent being could love an insignificant little girl like me.

As a teenager, I worked hard to be a good daughter and good student. I taught Sunday School and helped with AWANA. I memorized verses and prayed daily. Yet even then I could not fathom how God could love someone like me. After all, I knew I talked back to my mom and cheated on my math. I needed to be “good enough” to be loved by a powerful God.

Then, 10 years ago today, the truth finally became real for me. I had left an appointment and was driving to my husband's office to join him for lunch. I had just exited off the freeway when it came to me. It was as though God struck me with a lightning bolt. One moment it was not there, the next understanding moved from my head to my heart. I knew at that moment what I had struggled to understand all my life, what I had been taught from the day I was born until that moment. God loved me, there was no doubt. Not only did I know it was true, but I felt it in my soul. He loved me, not for anything I had done or not done or would ever accomplish. He loved me simply because I existed. Every part of me was loved because I was His creation. He planned me since before time existed. He planned everything about me from the mole on my hand to the lack of wisdom teeth. He planned that I would have a sense of humor and a tendency to procrastinate. He knew I would have my family’s tendency toward depression. He knew that I would learn and grow from the life experiences that would come my way. He knew that I would grow strong through Him and He knew that I would strive to become more like Him even with my failings. Even with all my imperfections and mistakes, He loved me because I am His.

In Psalm 139, David praises God for His attention to every detail of his being. God knows every move we make and He watches with care as we make our way through life’s pathways. And He is always with us each step of the way. His love is amazing and is beyond anything we can imagine.

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous--and how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God! They are innumerable! I can't even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up in the morning, you are still with me!
Psalm 139:13-18


Gayle said...

You are darned-tootin' He loves you, JGF, and this is a wonderful and beautiful post! Bless you! :)

Assorted Babble by Suzie said...

A beautiful and touching post JGF. Yes, God loves you and all of us. I appreciate you sharing a piece of your testimony with me. Mine is much like Joyce Meyer's background and I have learned that He accepts you as you are and knows where you came from as well as what you have experienced in your life. He assigns ones for different purposes in life (little or large tasks) and knows what each of us can do, handle or accomplish. I feel he looks at each one of us individually. If he can forgive us, we should forgive ourselves and others. It says in the Bible he forgets our sins as far as the the east is from the west. I wish I could memorize scripture..but have always had difficulties w/that.

I felt guilty for a long time and thinking I was suppose to be like Super Church Lady...but finally our Lord let me know....he had other purposes for me and that I should not feel that way. He will never give you more than you can handle. Purposes large or small needs to be felt within and lead to do those things. That is my feelings. If it is to giving out smiles to ones that may need it... to teaching in the church. Our Lord will let us know, if we only stop long enough to listen and pray for strength to press forward. Not listening to our flesh but our holy spirit.
Sorry for taking up so much room on this comment section.

ABFreedom said...

Excellent post JGF, bless you ... we won't be discussing my childhood ... k ... LOL

Patrick Joubert Conlon said...

I wanted to comment before but I thought - I'm not a real church-going Christian - so I didn't. But I loved your story and I love Psalm 139 - well most of the Psalms. Thanks.

jgf said...

Gayle: I am very blessed!

Suzie: You can always take as much space as you want!

AB: Then I won't ask...

Patrick: You don't have to go to church to be loved!

cori said...

Isn't that the most wonderful day when God finally turns the light on for you?! Something similar happend to me almost 10 years ago too. The Truth finally became mine. Not my parents, not the church's, but mine.

I'm so happy for you. It sounds as if you've been living in Him and growing in Him with such abundance these past 10 years. I so look forward to reading more about your life journey and seeing the hand of God at work in your life.

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

Awesome post filled with Truth!!!!!!! Couldn't agree with you more and glad you shared your story. I looooooove the Psalms!!

Son of Adam said...

I've come to a similar recognition about God.

The more I learn about Him, I realize He is even bigger than I ever imagined, and I am more insignificant. It makes the blessing of a personal relationship that much more of an impact.

Assorted Babble by Suzie said...

I thought of you last night when I was looking through 2 books my son gave me for my b'day.
1) God's Message for each day
2) Angels Everywhere

God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit.
1 Corinthians 10:13

P.S. Thank you for your reply. Love ya...(smiling)