The house was never quiet, certainly not at my bedtime, being one of the youngest in the group. Yet I do not recall specific noises. I remember an ebb and flow of noise, like the surf coming in and going out.
We were in the bathroom. I was old enough to care for my own needs and independent enough to want to do so. But he said he should help, so I let him, after all he was older and if he said it was so then it must be. He reached his hand down with the toilet tissue and wiped me after I had urinated. I felt strange about it. No one else did that for me anymore, mama didn’t even come into the bathroom with me unless I asked her to. I looked at him and wondered why, but did not vocalize my thoughts. After all, adults know best. He just smiled and said it was okay. He was sure I could do it myself since I was a big girl, but he just wanted to help.
I left him then and went on to bed. I curled up under the blanket and held Teddy close to me. I really did not want him to come in and say good night, but he came anyway and sat on the edge of the bed. I stayed as still as I could. Maybe he would think I was asleep and leave me be, maybe he would understand that he made me feel funny. He stayed for a time; it seemed like hours, although it was probably only a few minutes. Finally he was gone. And I slept.