Tuesday, November 30, 2010

A Plan

Okay, today it happened.  I finally exercised.  So it wasn't a run, not yet anyway, but still it got my heart rate up.  I decided yesterday that I had to get my exercise bike to a location.  A location where I might actually use it.  I moved a few things around, dusted, mopped.  Then my forebearing husband helped me move it upstairs.  Now I can use it during the day when things are quiet around here.  Hopefully, that will help me keep some of my fitness until I am running again.

Once my cough is gone, I will hit the treadmill until I get back to speed.  I have a plan.  This is the way to get me motivated.  I like a plan.  A plan helps me to focus and it helps me to relax.  A plan gives me something to focus on other than the things causing me stress.

On another hand, I am tired.  We have had 3 deaths in the last 5 weeks.  Even though each person was in our home only a short time, it takes a piece of me.  It isn't all about all the work and the long nights.  It is about the mental fatigue.  Trying to discern what is needed and to anticipate the need right before so I can be ready.  It is an honor to be a part of people's last moments, but I think it takes a toll on the living.  Even someone who is not emotionally envolved.  I need running.  It is cheaper than therapy!

Friday, November 26, 2010

Friday 5

Sleeping late.

A simple afternoon with family. 

A Nap.

Dog's warm welcome home after said afternoon.

Awesome staff.

And all these really happened today!

One of These Days

Just as I was getting back into running, it happened.  The motivation is gone and when it returns, it happens.  It started with a simple headache, then came the sinus pain and the sore throat.  The worst was yet to come.  The cough.  I started my inhalers and cough syrup.  If I jump on it, I can usually keep it to a simple cold.  Unfortunately, this time was not simple.  Simple cold went to bronchitis very quickly.  Sigh.  I am feeling better thanks to antibiotics and perscription cough syrup.  Hopefully, I can get back on the roads soon!  When I cannot run, it is all I really want to do...

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Surrounded

The last few days, I have been wondering how to put into words how grateful I am.  The way to express my gratitude for my blessings is beyond me.  I am surrounded by life and death.  It takes away the physical things and brings to light the intangible.  My heart is so full that I cannot describe the deepest emotions of gratefulness within.  Every day I am blessed beyond measure from the smallest detail to the greatest treasure.  The people around me are sent by God.  Family, friends and new aquaintances are gifts.  Each sunbreak, each snowflake and even every raindrop are gifts from God.  Each have a purpose and give a reason for appreciation.  Today, and every day, I am blessed with treasures.  It is my duty to appreciate them.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

John 14:1-4

"Don't let this throw you. You trust God, don't you? Trust me. There is plenty of room for you in my Father's home. If that weren't so, would I have told you that I'm on my way to get a room ready for you? And if I'm on my way to get your room ready, I'll come back and get you so you can live where I live. And you already know the road I'm taking."  (The Message)

This passage bring so much hope.  I am not long in this world.  I know where I am going.  I know who will meet me.  I cannot wait for that day when I see him in the clouds and he calls my name.  There will be no hesitation.  I will follow.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Always Together

Early this afternoon, I approached her and said we were going to go to her husband’s service. She looked a little surprised then said, "Oh, yes. We need to do that." I don't know if she subconsciously knew that it was coming or she did not understand exactly what I was saying. Her realization that he is gone comes and goes. Fortunately, for her, it is mostly gone. She wanted to make sure she looked okay. I told her she looked beautiful and she waved her hand at me. "You look beautiful," she replied with an emphasis on you. That may be just a saying, but I will take it where I can get it and thanked her.

Moments later, we were loaded in the Jeep and we were off to the funeral home. During the ride, we talked about her family. I told her they were all going to be there and support her. She held my hand and said, "Don't you leave me." I told her I would be close. She patted my hand and closed her eyes.

Her family was there to greet her--children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, nieces, nephews. She was gracious and greeted many. She loves her family and her eyes sparkle. She grasps hands and gives kisses. She is the family matron and it is her due. You can see how they love her. The years of love are bright as unshed tears bring a shine to many eyes. The sadness reveals the love they have for her as they view her frailty. Many realize that she will not be far behind. Maybe she realizes it as well.

The service is full of praise for her husband of 67 years. He was a man of strength and gentleness. He loved his family above all. Memories slide by that show pieces of his life. Her head is raised and her eldest daughter describes the photos. It makes no difference if she can see them. She knows him. She sees his face every time she closes her eyes. She knows every memory. She feels him at her side as he has been for many years.

She dozes the short distance to the cemetery. Grieving is tiring. Pain is fatiguing. Yet she holds on. The next generation brings him to her. He wrapped in fragrant wood. She swaddled in blankets. They are side by side once again. A pink rosary held in her hand then shared with her husband. Tears flow around her as she is serene. The cold begins to seep through the blankets and we move to leave. Again her family surrounds her. Young voices telling her they love her. This is for them, not for her. Her family needs to say the words. They need her to know. She knows. She always will.

Now she sleeps. A deep sleep. She may dream of those memories when they were young. She may dream of dancing as they were old. It matters not. She has him with her. She always will.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Friday 5

1.  Cold Medicine--even though I am NOT sick! 

2.  Fleece.  Warm, cozy, comfortable. 

3.  DVRs.  Watching programs on my own schedule without commercials!

4.  Powell's Book Store.  Rows and rows of books.  'Nuff said!

5.  Fuzzy socks.  See description for fleece above.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Finally

It has been far too long since my last blog!  We returned home from Paris on Tuesday the 8th.  Life got busy so I put off any writing.  Now, here I am.  Back to writing and finally back to running!  I paid for my running hiatus.  The cold weather and lack of hard workouts have cost me some fitness.  It is going to take some time to get back at it.  Yet it feels so good to want to run again!

Paris was amazing!  I love history and old buildings.  I certainly got both!  We spent 2 days in the Loire valley visiting chateaus.  One day, we traveled to Normandy and visited Point du Hoc, Omaha beach and the American cemetary.  That was an incredibly moving time.  The other days, Jeff & I walked miles around Paris.  We visited popular sites and happened on little out of the way places.  We ate crepes from stree vendors and climbed millions of steps.  We went to bed late and got up early.

It wasn't until Sunday morning that I finally got out for a run.  The Seine was just through a park from our apartment.  I headed out before anyone else was awake.  I had to watch my step as the path was cobblestones.  It was wonderful to run with views of Notre Dame and the Louvre.  I saw a few other runners and fishermen.  I heard the word "touristique" a couple of times.  I didn't care.  I was a tourist.  It didn't matter as I was reveling in the pure enjoyment of history and running.  Two of my favorite things!

Just a few photos of our trip to share!

 Morning run along the Seine with Notre Dame in the background

 Chateau de Chambord

Waiting in line to go up the Eiffel Tower 

Presenting Notre Dame 

The bell tower of Notre Dame 

Royal Fortress in Chinon