Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Self Sabotage

Once I decided that I was going to start transition on Friday, I began to sabotage myself. A little extra green here, picking at the lean as I put dinner away. Nothing that bad, but things I have not done in the 20 weeks I have been OP. I am afraid of transition--pure and simple. 5&1 is so simple. I choose my five little packets and decide on my L&G (usually grilled chicken and a salad). Then I just go about my day. With transition, I have more choices and more decisions to make. I am afraid I will mess up. I am afraid that my hard work will be for naught. I worry that I have not learned enough or the habits I learned aren't engrained in my being enough. The thing is as much as I doubt myself, my DH believes I can do this. He believes I can transition and maintain my weight. When I started MF, he was very skeptical. Over the weeks he has come to believe in me. I cannot let him down or anyone else that has been there for me. But most importantly, I have to trust that God will guide me through transition and maintainence. I must have faith in Him and in the strength he gives me. I can do this, because He gives me the strength to do all things.

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